pointe of worship

self worth

The excerpt below is from a friend's blog (jack fisher).

In his book Search for Significance, author Robert S. McGee has a great quote about self worth: "If Satan had a formula for self worth that he would love you to buy in to, it would be that your self worth is equal to your performance plus the opinion of others."

I read this blog right after sharing my life story in church yesterday. It spoke so deeply to me that I had to re-post it here (thanks in advance Jack!). Openly sharing our life with others can be scary. We anticipate how they will react and begin predetermining our sense of self worth based on 1) what we think they will say and 2) what we think they will think but not tell us. I'll admit that I lost a fair amount of sleep before and after my talk yesterday wondering these same things. However, when we have already established our self worth rating through God, we can openly share our lives and simply be utilized by Him.

I'll admit, yesterday was hard and I'm still wrestling inside with the finer points of what I just wrote... but knowing I have opened myself up to be fully transparent before my church is quickly moving into a great state of catharsis.

my salvation is none of your business

This Sunday I am supposed to share my life story in church.  I'm a bit uneasy about this for two reasons:

1. is my story worth hearing?
2. what will people think about my "lesser" side?

Comparatively I've lived a homely life - no major drugs, jail, faith or health crises. Then again, I have done some (ok, several) things I am not proud of. There were moments I would have qualified for jail. I spent several years battling low self-esteem, ignoring God, hating, judging, drinking, hurting others and hurting myself. Yet here I am, a part of God's story serving as a pastor of worship. Amazingly, God does not expect us to be righteous before He loves us; He doesn't even expect us to be somewhat right before love. Still, I've heard people say "I'm not ready for church, I need to get my life in order first." Unfortunately, the church often affirms this message by expecting people to act a certain way, to dress a certain way, to put on their church-face for Sunday worship. In the process of sharing the Gospel, we end up telling people what they are doing wrong in their lives. We talk about others in the sense of their sins: "they're having an affair", "they're a homosexual", "she's been in jail", "he's a bit racist", and in the process commit our own sin of judgment. So here's the deal, "my salvation is none of your business"*. Rather than focus on sin, heaven & hell, we should focus on helping others experience salvation NOW through a strong relationship with Christ. Sin is not a list to be kept that defines who we are, it is steps taken away from God. God has already forgiven us so this is not a question of passage into heaven, that has been affirmed through our acceptance of Christ. Rather, by changing our lives now we can experience a relationship with God that lessens the pains of this life and previews heaven.

*p.s. - I suggest reading "A New Kind of Christian" by Brian McLaren. This amazing book helped me better understand some of these concepts, including "my salvation is none of your business" which is actually a chapter title.